Travel with Me

I have been sitting in my bed the last hour or so just letting my mind wander as it will; it’s an interesting exercise and one you should try if you’ve never done it.  Simply lie back and let your mind go.  Don’t hang on to any one thought for too long, chewing and worrying on it like a dog with a bone.  Just let the thoughts ebb and flow in a loose rhythm, like the gentle lapping of water at the edge of a pond.  As each thought enters your mind acknowledge it briefly as you would a passing acquaintance on the street…a slow nod of mutual notice without forcing interaction.  Allow these thoughts their moment and then let each go as new ones take their place.

If you give yourself the freedom to let go of controlled thought, you can open a world of perception which bypasses prejudice and limitations.  I know of friends and family members who have struggled to always be in control of their thinking, never letting go so their minds can roam free.  I believe it is fear which gives them pause; they seem afraid of where their minds may lead them.  Allowing your thoughts to roam unfettered may lead you down paths you’ve never traveled; at the end of some of those paths, you may find truths which are hard to accept with your conscious mind…you’ve been wrong, you’ve lied or hurt someone, you aren’t perfect.  Accept these things, acknowledge them…and let them go.  Allow them to move on with the thoughts that have passed before them, with a quiet nod of notice and a passing wave as they go by.  Now is not the time to engage in a battle of wills between your conscious and your conscience.  Now is the time to just wander.

My mind will often take me on journeys I doubt I would experience if my conscious self were allowed to captain our ship.  I’ve been to distant lands, danced with exotic men, soared high among the eagles and sat quietly upon the shore of my own private island.  My mind is a constantly moving traveler, rarely staying in one location for long but rather seeking out new adventures and ways of experiencing the freshness of every day.  Sometimes, my mind refuses to get out of bed at all and simply lies there all day while I go about my business, refusing to participate in the mundane happenings of work, errands and the like.  I’m rather jealous of those days, and I quite suspect it has been eating my ice cream while I am at work.  Occasionally my mind will sternly point a finger in my face, lecturing me in that annoying tone I hate to hear…telling me I am wrong and I know it.  It’s usually right, though I don’t always admit to it.  At other times, my mind will sit back and give me an objective analysis of virtually any topic; it’s not always what I want to hear and not always listened to (which usually results in the finger wagging lecture I mentioned), but generally more accurate than my Magic 8 ball.

My favorite travels are the ones in which we go to the land of “Whatif”.  We can spend hours there strolling among the trees and buildings, imagining all of the amazing things we’d like to do, have, be or experience.  It is there in the magical land of possibilities I find some of my best inspiration and I nearly always bring back a souvenir or two.  On a recent journey, my mind and I rediscovered our passion for creating things…anything; ideas, drawings, websites, artwork, paper, soap, stories.  We like to create practical, unique and beautiful things; and share those creations with those around us.  On our latest journey to Whatif, I found a humanitarian seed – I’d never seen one in my world before…this roundish small thing, with a rosy hue and a positive glow, it tickles pleasantly and makes me smile when I look at it.  I’m going to plant it carefully and watch over it every day, in the hope I can find the right mix to make it grow.  I look forward to seeing the color it blooms!

Where have you traveled today?

Random Thought

Sometimes I think the world would be a better place without all of the people in it.

Why Am I Gaining Weight??

Okay, here’s the background…

After 24 years of carrying the nasty habit, I finally quit smoking this year.  I had my last cigarette February 5, 2011 and have not cheated even once since then.  I used Chantix at first, to help me over the hump and get through the worst of the transition.  I won’t pretend it was easy; truth is…it sucked.  I had to rearrange virtually everything about my lifestyle.  Not only was I dealing with a physical addiction, I had to learn a whole new way of going about my daily business that did NOT include cigarette breaks, cigarette buddies, cigarette anything.  It’s a lot harder than it seems, and for those of you trying, my advice to you is KEEP TRYING.  It’s not easy, but it’s worth it.  You will feel so much better in so many ways…keep trying until you do it.  You’ll be glad you did.

On to the real topic…my weight.  After reading the above paragraph, I’m sure you’re thinking to yourself, “Well duh, Reb…you quit smoking, started eating, gained weight.  No brainer! “.  Ah yes, and if we were having this little exchange 2 months ago, you would be absolutely right.  When I first quit, I turned to snacking to overcome the habit.  I gained nearly 10 pounds in that first 6 weeks, partly from snacking, partly due to a shift in my metabolism, and partly from the Chantix.  I reminded myself it wasn’t a big deal; ten pounds was a fair trade for 10 more years on my lifespan, right?

After about the 6th week, I realized I didn’t want to keep eating my way through nicotine cravings and I wanted to get off of the medication.  I’ve never liked taking pills; I don’t swallow them easily and I am notorious about forgetting to take them.  I researched several options and decided to join a local gym that was close to my house and on the way home from work.  In addition to joining a gym, I signed on for a bootcamp program with a local group of women to help motivate me and learn the right way to workout with weights.  Great, so I’m working out, hitting the gym, working with weights, learning how to eat right and manage my calories/carbs/proteins.

And I’m gaining weight.

Wait…what?  I’m gaining weight?  What the hell is this?

Well, as it turns out, muscle is denser than fat cells.  A size 6 woman with standard body fat of about 25% is actually likely to weigh LESS than a size 6 woman with a lower body fat percentage, but higher lean muscle mass.  Why is this?  Well the myth is that muscle “weighs more” than fat.  That’s not entirely accurate.  A pound is a pound, no matter what it’s made of.  However, lean muscle mass is denser than fatty tissue; simply put, muscle takes up less physical space…therefore, it takes more muscle to fill a pair of size 6 jeans, resulting in a gain on the scale.  Think of it like this…imagine two pairs of jeans laying on the bed…you stuff one full of feathers, and the other full of dirt.  Now try lifting each off of the bed…the pair stuffed full of feathers will be easy to pick up…while you struggle and strain to lift the pair stuffed full of dirt.  This is because the dirt is more dense than the feathers; it takes more dirt to fill the jeans, resulting in a much heavier load.  A pound of dirt weighs the same as a pound of feathers, but a smaller number of feathers can fill a larger space than can dirt particles…the same concept as muscle vs. fat.  Fat cells are less dense than muscle tissue, and they fill a larger space more easily.

Okay, that’s a bunch of complicated science crap…So what’s the bottom line?

When you’re working out and getting healthy…don’t rely on the scale to measure your progress!  You’ll get a more accurate measurement by judging how you feel and the fit of your clothing

Punctuate me to death…

We’ve all seen them…the friends on Facebook who follow every comment with !!!!!!, the text message asking a question that ends in ???????, or those who type only five words yet manage to use up all 140 characters of a tweet.  This is a pet peeve of mine, this overuse of punctuation marks.  It grates on me each time I see people doing this; each unnecessary exclamation point lowering my opinion of the person that much further, until eventually I simply lose interest in any thing they might have to say.  If I must wade through two lines of useless punctuation marks to translate what you’ve said…and then I must determine how many of those exclamation points are actually warranted based on the relative excitement of your news…and then I have to stop and think whether it’s good news or bad news or if you’re just being a ridiculously childish communicator once again…

*sighs and shakes my head*

There is a certain art in being able to communicate effectively, conveying both emotion and intellect with words and inflection.  I have realized that, sadly, in our age of instant messaging and digital “now” communication styles, the art of language is being lost.  People no longer take the time to use words to convey their excitement over an event.  Telling your friends about the spectacular deal you just found on a sinfully sexy new pair of stilletos has been replaced with “OMG!!!!!!!! NU SHOES!!!!!!!!!!!!!”.  While I’m glad you are happy to have found a new pair of shoes, I frankly don’t consider this information to be nearly as exciting as say… winning the lottery, or receiving a surprise marriage proposal from the crown prince of some decadently rich little country.  The preceding items warrant OMG!!!!!!!.  A new pair of shoes?  Unless they’re a new pair of custom made stilletto heels with a switchblade hidden in the heel (oh how I would love a pair of those!) and a handsome prince to place them on your feet (I wouldn’t turn one of these down either)…one exclamation point will do, thank you.

Best laid plans…

…I realized I’ve been slack in my promise to post at least once per week on this blog.  I realized this because, as usual, my mind began wandering as I munched on my after dinner snack.  I stood here staring out the window, watching as the sky darkened and the breeze became cooler.  My mind wandered to all of the things I wish I could be doing each day.  “Why can’t I seem to fit everything in?”, I mused.  Is it because I’m not being efficient enough?  Or am I simply trying to do too much with too little time.  Sadly, it is most likely the latter scenario, and frankly not the first time I’ve found myself caught in the hamster-wheel of “too much, too little”.  Too much to do, too little time.  Too many ideas, not enough energy.  Too many adventures, not enough “oomph” in me to get to them all.

Maybe it’s just time to simplify.